Wrinkly Slag Tags
The old guy in front of me was a new client. I hoped he was going to be easier to deal with than
some of my other clients. I needed the money though so was swallowing my usual disgust for the
old and was exuding zen-like patience. I wondered why so many people hitting their 70’s and 80’s
had gone for body modification. After looking at so many wrinkly tattoos and stretched ear lobes I
was genuinely baffled.
I got out a fresh intsamp and asked the old guy to get ready. Luckily he wasn’t a modder, he didn’t have a Prince Albert thank god. He also didn’t seem to have any tattoos or other piercings either. Or the tell-tale holes left behind by removed piercings.
“Try to relax. You’ve never gone in for any tattoos or piercings have you?”
“No” He said in a confused tone. “Is that linked to my condition then?”
“What? No not at all, I was just thinking that there seemed to be a lot of people your age that have. Lots of markings I’ve seen”
“You what? Relax please.” I inserted the device and let it do the work of sampling
“mmmmfff, slag tags, women with tattoos just above their bum?”
“Never heard them called that before” I said looking at the read out on the back of the intsamp “you’ll be relieved to hear that you have an all clear” I said removing the device and ejecting the disposable part.
“Well that’s a relief then.”
“OK sir, I’ll print off a drug for you for the constipation, see you in another year”
I’m going to have to get out of the travelling proctology game I thought to myself for the millionth time.